My life is insanity...

I've spent my entire existence repeating the same mistakes, over and over again. I live in absolute insanity, just an unending cycle of the same thoughts, fears, and anxieties. I've never taken control over my circumstances when I really just stop and think about it. Yet everyday I'm faced with this reality, its in front of me, and always has been, either I'm too much of a coward to take action, or I'm in fucking competent. Life is a wild thing. I'm still not sure what to make of any of it. I'm tripping pretty hard rn just needed to see this in words.