Struggling to articulate opinions?

So I have this issue for a few reasons. I’ve only recently pieced it all together. First off, “discussions” as my stepdad words it are more like debates where I get steamrolled. At least with him and maybe others. But not all the time so I never know. Also I think in pictures and struggle to articulate it. Lastly I struggle to actually gather together a clear memory of what formed this opinion. Because everything is so fractured and I never know who holds what…

It’s really frustrating. Because I have a lot of differing beliefs from my family, stepdad especially and I want to be able to at the very least articulate that my beliefs are different and why. I have no interest in debating or trying to convince anyone in my family of my side. Because they have their own beliefs and I’ve got mine and there won’t be ant convincing them

A part of me does feel like they don’t really deserve such a deep look into who I am when they’ve been awful to me. So i don’t know… maybe I just feel like I’m living a lie by not telling them?